China Ghosts

My patient husband is trying to put down a crying Josie who refuses to give into sleep, while Emma and I are spending some quiet time reading in my bed. I just finished another fantastic book, China Ghosts: My Daughter’s Journey to America, My Passage to Fatherhood by Jeff Gammage. One of my favorite sentences in his book is from the epilogue, “Adopting a child from China puts you through a transformation, gathering you up from one place, spinning you around, then setting you down somewhere else, facing backward. It changes your life in ways you never could have foreseen.” (page 237).



Josie’s adoption is an emotional journey of extremes. It's a place where utter joy is paired with sheer exhaustion on a daily basis. Here’s a child who can smother me with kisses/hugs and then wake up screaming in fear hours later. It’s not anything I could have prepared for prior to our adoption. It’s just something that I'm continuing to work through. It’s made Chris and I stronger and better parents. Connecting with other adoptive mothers, and my blogging support group is what saves me on a daily basis. I also appreciate how my coworkers continue to be sympathetic to my sleep deprivation and ongoing Josie stories.

Chris and I recently met with our social worker to compile information for our six month post-placement report. In preparation for our meeting, we had a list of questions that needed to be answered. It gave us an opportunity to sit down and reflect about the last five months as a family of four. It’s been a whirlwind of activities, emotions and milestones. We both came to the same conclusion. If we were younger, and the adoption process wasn't so long, we’d adopt another child with a medical condition. It’s been a life-altering experience and we are more enriched because of it.

People often tell us that Josie is so blessed to be a part of our family. Chris and I both quick to respond that Josie has blessed us more than we could have ever expected. Now, if we could only get her to sleep through the night and understand that daycare is actually a good thing, life would be GRAND in the Kenward household.