July 8, 2008

Equal Time

Going through an adoption is extremely exhausting and emotionally consuming. We spent over two years preparing for Josie’s arrival and then once we got home from China, we were dealing with all kinds of heart specialists and her open-heart surgery/recovery. For the last three months, it’s been a rollercoaster of emotions in our house. As much as I’ve tried to provide equal time for both girls, it just isn’t perfect. God bless my friends who have multiple children and can find a way to make every child feel special.

Today was an Emma and Mommy day. Josie stayed home with Chris and the two of us attended the new American Girl movie and then did a bit of shopping at the mall. Seeing the smile on Emma’s face and hearing her thank me for the alone time, reminds me that I need to do this more often. I especially need to remember this once I return to full-time work and the pace gets even more insane.


6 comments:

The Young's said...

That DEFINITELY IS the hardest part once you come home. We struggle with helping all three feel loved and important. Because the younger ones demand so much time...the older ones sometimes have to sacrifice! I think your special day with Emma was wonderful!!! I wanted Sophie to see Kit for her b'day movie...but she chose Wall-E instead. I would have MUCH rather seen Kit. I am SO glad you and Emma had that special time!! It spoke VOLUMES to her, I'm sure!!

I bought this thing at the local Christian bookstore...called "Secret Keeper Girls". It's a series of special "dates" for mom and daughter to go out on....and it provides GREAT topics that are age appropriate such as "real beauty", "purity", etc. We've managed to do our first one and Sophie loved it. I need to get our next one scheduled. I bet Emma would like it too!! :)

Hope you have a wonderful week!!
Love,
Buffi

Nikki said...

I'm sure Emma appreciated the special Mom Time even more than you know.
That, for us, has been the biggest adjustment: finding equal time for both kids.
After almost a year, I think we've gotten a routine down.
You are not alone, believe me.
Good for you and Emma!
And, of course, all that Daddy-Josie time is great too. :)
Love-
Nikki

Mike and Barb said...

Oh, Kim, I don't think there is such a thing as "equal time" when you have more than one child. But it's definitely one thing to keep in mind.
I'm glad you had a fun time with Emma. Anya really didn't tell me too much about the movie, so I'll just have to wait until it comes out on DVD to get the scoop on it :-))
Love, Barb

Nicole said...

You're doing great, Kim!!!! I know what you mean about giving equal time to both kids... We're having to make sure to do the same now that we have 3. It's not easy, but it will all work out!

hugs,
Nicole

Steffie B. said...

Don't worry....it all comes together....once school starts and Emma is in her routine again it won't seem so new to her. Josie does require a lot of attention now so she bonds and feels secure. I think you are doing great.....I had a one on one day with Emmie yesterday too, today we are going out again and Saturday night she'll go out with David and I. She leaves for a Volleyball camp Sunday at U of M so we are trying to give her time. You just do it where and when you can!

Have a great weekend....I'm hoping to have some exciting news to share soon! ;)

Blessed Mom of Four, Now Five said...

Hi Kim,
Thank you for always checking on me and sending encouragement.
You will find ways to make certain both of your girls feel loved--not always easy when 5 blessings live in your house. When we first came home, I had to give Josie-Tatum special time at least once a week, but she is better able to share Mama now.
I am certain when Ellie has her surgery, we will need to set up Just Mama and JT time again for a little while.
Enjoy your slower schedule,
Robbie